A guide to eyefucking, the perfect way to flirt from a distance

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Dating has long been a challenge for the awkward dummy community (of which I am a member). This has only been exacerbated by the dangers of a deadly virut tearing through the country, which has required many people lớn regularly cover their faces in public for the first time, limit in-person tương tác with people they might be interested in, & be newly & radically honest early into any interaction that could potentially lead to physical intimacy. All of this means that flirting takes a lot of extra effort right now.

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There has been one unexpected upside khổng lồ the no-contact mask life, though. One which, in its simplicity & hotness, is a balm khổng lồ the horny soul; a face-to-(distanced)-face pick-me-up that isn't hindered, but enhanced by mask-wearing; and a thrill that takes only a second khổng lồ enjoy. I've embraced the art of eyefucking.

For women and non-binary people, one-sided public staredowns have long been a tool of predatory creeps. An eyefuck is different from unwanted ogling because it's all about reciprocation. It has to be fun for both parties, as in the following: Not too long ago, I stopped on my bike before crossing the street, và a good-looking guy rode up. He locked eyes with me and sustained eye liên hệ for an inordinate amount of time. Finally, he looked away, probably khổng lồ make sure he wasn't gonna get hit by a Subaru Outback—then gazed right into my eyes again. It wasn't the kind of eye liên hệ that tacitly says, I need khổng lồ cross into the xe đạp lane, ma'am, so please stay where you're at. It was smoldering, & the implied message was, Why don't you make my face your bike seat.



I was shaken lớn my core. Sure, my eyes have the alluring coloring of fresh mud on a stable floor, but with a xe đạp helmet on, fogged glasses, the bottom half of my face covered, and Jacuzzi tits (that's when sweat pools under your tiddies so it's like a pool of hot water under there), the eyefuck was unexpected, but hot as hell. That moment in which someone's son straight-up bodice-ripped the fuck out of my pupils for 10 seconds while straddling a road bike had me almost ready khổng lồ risk it all. (That's what happens when sensual cảm ứng becomes forbidden. I'd absolutely be the first to lớn die in a horror movie where horniness was punishable by Subaru Outback to the upper torso.)


Sorry to flex, but this is far from the only instance that the remnants of my Lasik eye surgery have been eyefucked within an inch of their near-sighted lives since the pandemic hit, by people of all genders, and I've been living for it. I asked around, và others have experienced & partaken in these same mutually appreciative visual bang sessions during their regular COVID-19 activities: walking down the street, at the grocery store, while hanging at the park. Someone on Twitter told me a recent eyefuck “was basically like second base.” My good friend Meredith was given a hot-and-heavy glimpse from a stranger she passed after leaving the hardware store with a plant: He tilted his head slightly, looking her up và down, và when he met her gaze again, he held it until they were no longer in each other's line of vision.

“It was flattering,” she said, “and a little surprising, because my ratio of ‘wearing yoga pants’ to lớn ‘actually doing yoga’ has definitely been out of whack during quarantine, so it was good lớn feel like, Yes, bitch, you’ve still got it.”

The likelihood is that you're also getting sight-seduced, even if you haven't noticed it yet. If that sounds fun to you: Look around! Given the dramatically reduced opportunity for physically touching hot strangers, everyone is likely feeling like a Little Caesars $5 pizza—hot và ready, in this case, lớn eyefuck attractive passersby. (But also like that Little Caesars pizza, acting on your desires might make you sick, so proceed with caution.)


If you want to lớn learn khổng lồ eyefuck like it's your job, consider the following scenario: You see a cutie at the opposite over of a crosswalk. Imagine yourself as Rihanna (great adnhatroso.com for any situation) và ask yourself, If Rihanna were walking across this street và A$AP Rocky was on the other side, would she be nervous about firing off a 500-degree Tyra Banks smize that would mix his dick on fire? She would not. She would blaze those hazel stunners into his soul, simultaneously making and ruining his day in the process simply by being hot & confident, & continue on her way to Olive Garden to lớn enjoy their classic Tour of Italy entreé and never-ending breadsticks, & A$AP would spend his life wondering what could have been. That's a power nguồn move. You want that energy.

All you actually have to vày to make this happen is sustain eye tương tác with a potentially willing party for roughly three seconds, and maybe địa chỉ a tiny eyebrow raise or sly grin khổng lồ give your eyes a twinkle, then see if they give you something back. (If not, move on!) This tactic is best employed when the "interaction" is fleeting, like with a fellow shopper in the frozen food section at Trader Joe's or as you leave the bodega with a bacon egg and cheese. Keep it cute & quick, then walk away. That's really all it takes. Do not, under any circumstances, just stare at someone for long periods of time without breaking the gaze. That is serial killer, telekinetic firestarter, or just plain clown behavior. No one likes that! The key is to lớn show interest & be brief.

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If you're sitting outside a coffee cửa hàng and you've employed a solid, non-weird eyefuck on a dễ thương stranger at the next table, & it's returned more than twice, you can then take it lớn the next cấp độ by saying hi. Maintain social distance, và if the person makes it clear they're not interested, take your latte and scone & GTFO. Shoot your shot, but be cool & respectful about it.

Since I decided to lớn lean into that eyefucking life, I've felt a surge of confidence first in myself—and in talking lớn people I'm interested in. When I moved into a new apartment last month, I hired a moving company infamous for employing a team of extremely hot dirtbag punks. To quote Saweetie, that's my type (despite my better judgement và being far beyond my teen years).

I got payment squared up with the mover who I thought was particularly cute, và we made  back-and-forth eye liên hệ as I handed over my cash (and a joint for good measure). I walked him out, drenched in sweat và sniffly from the dust bunnies under the couch, và delivered a RiRi-level eyefuck; he stared right back with equal heat. The eyefuck emboldened me to lớn text him after & ask him out—had his number from co-ordinating the move—because why the hell not? Everything is terrible, & we need to find ways lớn feel good. Turned out, he was super down.

It's sort of irrelevant whether the eyefuck leads to more, though. If it does, great, but eyefucking is a perfect activity all on its own. Adding momentary seductive glances khổng lồ your day is safe và fun, và makes you feel like a self-possessed smokeshow even if you haven't showered in two days. In times lượt thích these, when we're all living in "athleisure" (read: underwear và oversized sweatshirts), struggling in a multitude of ways, và riddled with anxiety, depression, and/or fear, that's a win. Eyefucking helps you carry yourself lượt thích a bombshell, even if the tương tác you're making with others begins & ends with your eyes.


Tagged:DatingflirtinghorninessCOVID-19Apart và TogetherHow khổng lồ Be Hot

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